"An addict will always sooner or later, fuck up". That is what my friend told me quite some time ago. My friend grew up along side of gamblers. Not his family, but all those associated in his Dad's business. My friend said, that an addict will chose their addiction over everything else overtime. He has first hand knowledge as he saw gamblers, close family friends lose everything over their addiction.
An addict will rationale everything so others are to blame. Never the Addicts fault is it?
You know what else is unique to addicts? They don't grow. At least, most of them are stuck in a certain age. Ever notice how immature an addict can be? It is because they don't grow. They don't know how. How do you contend with the actions of an addict?
No matter what you do, you will be the bad guy. An addict looks for validation of how they want things to be. They will provoke, they will be upset, they will work themselves up into an argument with you, until they get the reaction they thrive on. They want to be the victim. Always the victim.
The sad thing is that after an argument you feel like the bad guy. You let your emotions go and you argue. Wrong thing to do. But how can you reason with insanity? An addict is insane. No one sane would give up their family for something that destroys lives. So that must be it. They must not be sane. What else could it be? You would not willing let an addiction suck the life out of your soul? Would you?
I like the idea that an addict can beat the addiction. That they can start to grow again. That joy can come back into their lives. I mean real joy. Joy in the feeling that you can love someone, something other than an addiction. I hope for that.
So it is better to think that an addict can be more than a fuck up. They can be more than a mess up. That in the end they will chose a good life rather than a sick life.
You know what it says on my Mom's epitaph says? It says "Weweni Mino Pimatisiwin" She lived a good life. That is what people want, to live a good life. I was glad that my Mom did live a good life.