Saturday, April 9, 2016

The Sting of Betrayal.

Betrayal comes in many forms; the cheating husband, the friend who uses you, the boss who uses your ideas for their own, the verbal agreement broken, the undermining of your worth, and the  call you down to other parties.

Betrayal can be small things like not keeping a promise to pick you up for a movie but they go with someone else or it could be a huge event like sleeping with your wife's Auntie (and telling her I love you - - Auntie).  Regardless betrayal is a break of trust. Are we at fault in the betrayal. I mean after-all you knew what I was like and you still married me. Or is the fault of betrayal on the one who has broken the trust?

Betrayal no matter how small stings. It hurts. The reason it hurts is because it is personal. Betrayal in its very nature is personal. I don't know if you can be betrayed but a stranger.  I  am sure politicians betray all the time. It can be very personal to some and "oh well, its just another day at the office of a politician" for others.

Feeling bad for someone close to me.  He is the midst of a work coup-d'etat.  I feel bad because of the situation; a small work place with friends and acquaintances. What is repugnant is to use a major cause and to fit it into their personal grievance. How sad is that. We  are constantly skewing situations to fit our narrative. It is the way of betrayal - vilify those not on your side.  Opportunity is key. So when you see a wound like a colleague under fire, there may be those who will pounce on the wounded. I wish I could be a judge of integrity. Like to say you have no integrity. But I'm a person who does not have the luxury of integrity.  I am not that person. In any case neither are those taking part in the work place coup.  It happens everyday in many situations.

Can we  look at betrayal as normal? Can we excuse it? Or is it so vile that we can never forgive betrayal?

I think we forgive or overlook betrayal all the time. At the same time our trust has been broken and in some cases crushed. The act of betrayal is hard to accept. It is because we invested in the other party, the other person. Depending on the level of trust we put into the relationship, it will have an impact on how we react.

What of the betrayer, are they bad?  Or is it the circumstance that put them in the position to betray?

I am not sure.

The gut reaction is to be really upset and angry at the betrayer. We don't question our role in the betrayer's actions. It all depends I guess.

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