He Hits You, Dump Him.

Jealousy is not cute. Hollywood movies and sitcoms may portray the jealous boyfriend/girlfriend as being cute. "Ahhh you were jealous for me?"  My Mom used to scold about the "green monster." She was the recipient of some not so cute moments of jealousy so she had some experience. She used to warn us about how my Uncle was to our Aunty. No jealousy is not an indication that he loves you. It is a sign about how insecure we are as men so run away Women.

There are many little signs for you Women to watch out for. It starts very early on, when you are first becoming to know each other. He will say things like "I wish I knew you long ago." Why does he wish that? The experiences from your life make you who you are, so why would he want to negate that? Simple, he wants to be first, the first love, the first friend, he doesn't want you to have experienced relationship before you. He wants you all to himself. It will only become more and more pervasive as time goes on. He will say things like, "who you thinking of?" and "you still love him?".  In time it will become more harsher with him no liking how you do your makeup or have your hair styled. "Who you losing weight for?" It is crazy because the things which made you attractive to him are now his sense of dread. He doesn't like your friendly open mannerisms. He starts to hate it that you have friends. He will start with making remarks about your friends, saying "they are using you." The insecure man will be come angry, angry at you because he is jealous and doesn't feel good about himself. He will get mean, first with his words, "you were fucked before I fucked you." He will attack your house, break cups, punch walls and then he turns on you. He pushes you. He hits you. He chokes you. He puts you in the hospital. Finally he kills you.

It is easy to say, "Leave him." The fear of being alone, or the thought he will change, has people thinking there is light at the end of the tunnel. The man will be the man you want him to be, so you excuse his beahviour; "he didn't mean it, he was drunk, he is so kind when sober." Change is not an easy thing. Can an abusive man change? Maybe, there have been some who have. But not before there was much suffering by a Woman. In some cases the only reason a man is not beating you is because he is either in jail or he is dead.

A 3 year old boy was stabbed as he slept. He was stabbed in the neck and numerous times by a man who was abusive to the Mom. The boy suffered brain damage and was taken off life support. The story of what happened is one of abuse. The man had a restraining order and was not suppose to be in contact with the mother of the boy. He met up her a local bar, beat her and then he walked over to her home to stab the boy. The boy was not his son.

Innocence 

What I can only think is just how? How can anyone be so cruel?

What do we as a public do with our anger? How can we help the family? How can we do something tangible?  I say donate blood, take part in a rally, voice against domestic violence, call out men who are being abusive.