Awareness Walk for Missing Murdered Indigenous Women

You don't know the names of these two young boys - Kendal Wood and Darnel Wood.  Kendal is now 15 years old and Darnel is 13. This is there third year of Walking on Trans Canada Highway from the Ontario border to the Saskatchewan border.

Kendal & Darnel Wood

Kendal and his younger brother are from the Island Lake Treaty 5 territory. The boys take part in a other awareness activities like: Children Fighting to Keep Girls Safe, Children's March for the Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women and Girls and other Vigils held in Winnipeg, Manitoba.

"We are showing that we kids can do work like this too. We think about it. There are kids who understand and don't want to stand back but what can they do? Wee are showing that we are First Nations youth can stand up and make this everyone's cause to take on" says Kendal Wood.

So check out Kendal and Darnel's Facebook page. If you wish more information contact:
Denny Wood 1-204-615-1575 or Kendal Wood jayd2_06@yahoo.ca

Just think these guys were 10 and 12 when they started their annual walk. What in the heck were we doing at that age?

Trans Canada Highway

Cops Hunt Blacks like they are Prey.

Buck Fever - is a phenomenon a hunter will experience. The hunter sees a prey and starts shooting aimless , excited with their adrenaline rising and they go into a frenzy. In many cases the shooter gets crazy. There is no regard to where he/she is shooting, no thought of consequence.

Last night  Philando Castile was shot for having a busted tail-light and for being Black.  A couple of days before that Anton Sterling   was killed for selling CD's and for being Black. In both cases the police were quick to fire their guns multiple times. 

It is a  common occurrence through the United States and it matters not if you are man or woman or even a child (Tamir Rice).   The police have really been active in killing Black people.  Do you wonder why?



Is it these Black people are criminals? Do they ask for it?  You may think yes or perhaps if they just listened to the police instructions, they would not have been shot. There is really something going on here and its not just police procedure.  It is a culture; a culture of fear anger and resentment.
Society does not see the Black person as a part of the community meaning they are not seen as people. This of course is true of what is thought of the Muslim and the Indian (Indigenous folk).  Blacks (and other  non-Whites) are not seen as part of the wider community - the White community.  So in many instances if they are not seen as part of the community - who are they? It is abundantly clear in the eyes of law enforcement (and the "community") Blacks (and other non-Whites) are prey. With the police (and community watch folk  - Trayvon Martin) the culture is that of a hunter - in many cases stalking prey or happening upon prey.  With hunting there is always the risk of getting excited, the blood pressure rising, the fear of the prey, the frenzied actions. That is Buck Fever and the police have it. They don't see Sally their neighbor or Bob the neighbor who will throw weekend barbecues; they see something else. They don't see the kid Tommy playing with toy in the park. The result is what you see - Blacks shot in the midst of  a frenzied zeal. 

With Mr Castile he was lucky in the sense that his girl friend Ms Reynolds had the bravery and calm to live stream her boyfriend dying next to her and her child. For her actions she was handcuffed, arrested and treated in a horrible manner. Reminds me of the situation with Ipperwash and the family of Dudley George. The police killed Mr George and treated the family in a horrible manner, stopping them from taking him to hospital and arrested them. Ms Reynolds was arrested and detained for what?  The police didn't see her as a person - just part of the equation - part of the hunt - part of the prey. 

So  what now?  Do the Black people and their supporters stand around and shout slogans and get soundbites in the media?  Where there is a culture in society to protect the hunter and to discount the prey? 

There is a culture of disconnect in the US with Blacks and in Canada with the Indigenous-Indian. The wider community does not see them as people- part of the community. Look at what happens in Canada where an Indian man is killed with passive actions (Brian Sinclair - left to die a slow painful death in hospital emergency). They didn't see him as a man. They "compassion fatigue" him to death.  In Canada Indians are the Savage, the shiftless drunken bum.  Not human. In Canada a young Indian was raped and killed. The justice system took and put her vagina as part of the evidence. Just think about it. She was brutally killed and mutilated, the justice system removed her vagina as evidence to be displayed in court. Would they do that a white person.  Not people. In the US the Black person is seen as the criminal, the Negro and not a person.  

The Celebrity Black is still  not seen as a person. They are seen as part of the show/game. As part of the entertainment for real people. 

Let me ask you this if a young White boy is playing with a toy gun in a playground, what do you see? You see a young child playing. So if you saw him as a child, a person  wouldn't you take more than two seconds, two seconds to check out the situation?  If you don't see a child you see what?  Prey? Criminal? Less than a person?  That is what happened with the young child Tamir Rice. And just let the sink in while you look at the shoot out in Texas with White Bikers. They sat around texting and visiting after the police arrived?  And you know why? Because even criminal groups like the Bikers (and white supremacy groups) are considered people first.  Not the Black person.  There are so many examples of this and if you don't see it? 

The main stream society, the average White person does not see a Black person as a person, a neighbour, and part of the community. Even the regular non-racist person will see the color first and not the person. Its deeply ingrained in the culture of western society. You really think slavery and colonial oppression was long ago? Those sentiments are not easily erased. 

And if you think there is no hunting fever - buck fever going on in the States - there is really something wrong with how you see the world.  

PS. I know the word "buck" has different meanings - both for the Black and for the Indian. 

* Since this original post  there have been  more suspect shootings of Black people by police and citizens. 

Sundance & Oshkaabawas

Sundance is the Ceremony of Ceremonies. Sundance ceremonies are taking place in Indigenous communities all over Canada and the United States.  Among the Ceremony will be the participants and the Helpers.

Tree Of Life

I did have the opportunity to go to the Sundance in Sagkeeng First Nation for a very short visit. A friend comes every year from Ontario to support the Ceremony. It was nice to go see the Sundance in my Reserve. Later I went and camped out for the Sundance in Spruce Woods Manitoba. These Sundance Chiefs are Good people; David and Sherryl Blacksmith.

I went and visited at the Sundance this year as my youngest daughter is dancing. Many people from all over taking part in the Ceremony.  One of the things you get when you to go a Ceremony is you experience, hear and see Teachings.

As you know Teachings are life moments which either resonate with you or they are ignored. We get Teachings everywhere and from anyone. The old lady on the bus who gives her seat to a stranger - kindness. The police officer who helps an intoxicated man get home - compassion. The Teacher who spends time with your daughter/son to help read - giving/patience.  The Elder who shares the Oral history passed down from other Elders. The Helper who demonstrates devotion and earnest work while staying up all night in the pouring rain making sure the Sacred Fire remains burning.

One of the things that struck me at the Ceremony was the honesty. The honest language spoken to our people. The Teaching of forgiveness but also of reciprocity and of humbleness.  The Teaching of Pride as well. How the family who conduct the Sundance are so proud of their family. If you didn't know them you would judge (or even if you do know them) them as bragging. You would think they are excluding everyone. You are not part of the clique. It's not the case. If you were listening you would have seen the love they have of their family for sure. You would have also heard the love for the people. The Teachings of Gratitude for the many helpers and Dancers who take part in Ceremony. You would have heard the struggle and the rewards of being a Helper - for the Creator. The many people who work behind the scenes and the people who work out front are all Helpers.

So we either take Teachings or we ignore them. That's key isn't it. Some of the Teachings we should have witnessed or experienced are tolerance, understanding, gratitude, appreciation, jealousy, envy, and insecurity.

I sat with different people and spoke with some old friends, new faces and some acquaintances. The conversations varied.  One friend was speaking about someone we both know and it was said "He is cursed you know? You can't treat people like that and expect to get away with it. He is an asshole." I nodded in agreement.  I believe I am both cursed and blessed. The other conversation focused on some of the Oshkaabawas(ag) i.e.Helpers. "That fellow is real lazy. Looks to be doing stuff but just being lazy". Another person I met was a professor from Carlton University of Ottawa. He teaches in the Religious Study department. I was trying get him to Pierce his skin and drag the Buffalo Skulls. I told him to get the "whole experience", he didn't become a professor by being naive.  So he didn't take part in the Piercing Ceremony or the dragging of the Skulls.  I'm kind of a jerk. It reminded me of when we Danced years ago. It was  our first year and the Oshkaabawas (helper) was getting Dancers up and taking them to be Cut  and hooked up to the Tree. This Elder was beside us and it was his first year dancing as well. I told the Oshkaabawas (we say Skha-be) "the guy is ready to pierce". The Helper came to him and I said to "they want you to go".  The Elder, a first year dancer, looked, his eyes went big and he said "ma-ma-me me?"  It was funny. I am such a jerk.

That is the thing about the Teachings we either take them or ignore them. I walked around with many of the people who I once broke bread with and yet I felt like a stranger here. I felt pity for myself, even days after the Ceremony. "How come no one wants to sit and visit with me or invite me for tea?"  "How come I am a stranger among people I thought were friends? How come they won't talk to me? How come no one likes me?"

The Teachings were many. I laughed and stood in admiration of the Sundance Chief who spoke to the people. Can you imagine the pressure to be held accountable for the whole Ceremony?  What if something unforeseen or tragic were to happen?   I once saw a man break his leg while he was taking part in the Sundance years ago. What if someone had a heart-attack?  The amount of ownership and liability which falls on those who lead. "Heavy is the head that wears the Crown".

The Chief was blunt in his address to the people.  People need to hear it sometimes. They need to hear about effort and dedication. They need to hear it and to see it about how we need to support each other. The Teaching was evident with the coming together of the Ceremony. Can you imagine the work involved?

For example, one of the great things about the Ceremony was the toilets. Toilets?  Yes, the fact the Helpers raised funds to pay for the rental of portable toilets. The toilet company came around everyday and emptied the containers. Thank goodness.  There was the Old Man who drove around his pick up truck and collected garbage from each camp site. The Women and Men who went into the bush to cut fire wood and collect the branches. The amount of Help and Helpers is amazing.

And there are those of us. Those of us who sit and judge. Who sit and complain. Who want the Helpers to make the Lodge, cut the wood, make sure we have everything there for us. When we don't agree with what is said or something that took place, we jump at it. We are quick to fault. We are quick to put down. We are quick to ignore the beauty in what takes place. We sit and feel like outsiders in a Ceremony where everyone is welcome. We feel like its' only for them. Some say "oh that Ceremony is not like the real Dakota way. Or it's not Ojibwe. Or he is not Cree enough".  If you hear that, you know the Helpers and leaders hear it as well.

The thing is the Ceremony, the Helpers the Lodge leaders are there for you; for the people. They do have their families and everyone of us should be proud, should be happy for our family. That is what we see there.

To all the Helpers and Leaders out there, we say Thank you. We take the Teachings of appreciation and hope to remember it.

We take the Teaching of Gratitude and express it.

We take the Teaching of Envy and Jealousy and try to be aware of it.

We take the Teaching of ...

You know the toilet at the Sundance is emblematic of our people. In some way we expect others to take care of our shit. Take the participants of the Ceremony. There are many people carrying varied baggage.  I for one carry the sting of resentment. I saw this handsome Dancer giving of himself. But did I look at it like that? No. What I saw is a young man with a tattoo of a Manitoba Warriors symbol on his chest. A proud reminder of (like Izzy said to me years ago) MW for life. I didn't see a selfless man who was sacrificing himself for the people. I saw a past. A past that I know nothing of. I don't know him, but yet I carried the resentment for a man I don't know. Maybe he has a ailing mother or child. Maybe he has turned his life over to the Creator. Instead I judged him and many with contempt.

I judged many of wanting the "scars" to show off and not the scars of sacrifice for others. I judged that many Dancers just want the look of Wab Kinew - with his beautiful skin and body with his piercing scars pronounced as he is pictured on television or on various media pictures. But how in the heck do I know what is the hearts of people? See that is the thing, we hear the Teachings but we ignore them or discount them.

Like having a helper who is a politician or a Leader or a police officer. Some people will say "you can't be a police officer and be Indian at the same time, Never mind be a Traditional Teacher and a police officer at the same time".  It is the resentment, envy or jealous Teaching we carry. We fail to look at the Helper who is not only taking care of you but trying to educate others in making sure you are safe. One of the things this one Helper does is make sure there is "surgery type cleanliness" when working with the cutting the skin.  He and his friends make a handout for you to understand the process of blood transfer. Hoping others will benefit from the information and carry on the practice elsewhere. 

We need to listen to the Teachings - tolerance - kindness - caring - gift giving.  These Helpers gladly do it all. They don't have to. They can let you come and take part without providing you with the information.  They can let you come and be unprepared. 


I urge you to read the book by Jon Krakauer, Into Thin Air. It is a story of fantastic feats and also of the selfishness of people.  The feat of completing a Sundance is a heck of journey. And like that of the people who can climb Mount Everest, they don't do it without support. The Helpers, the guides and the Leaders are vital to their success, along with their dedication. Like the journey in Thin Air, there are many obstacles. Some are even carried; emotionally and physically to  make the journey. 

The Ceremony of Sacrifice is exactly that. We are suppose to literally and figuratively give our lives to the Creator for the welfare of others. However we are just human beings filled with many failings. 
Whatever the reason we do Ceremony for, we should open our eyes, ears, mind and of course our hearts. If we can, we can carry the good Teachings and we can be aware of our faults and what we need to correct. 

It is the sacrifice of Helpers Leaders, and the many many supporters which allows Ceremony to continue. Ceremony is essential in our lives as Indigenous people. 

Finding the Boogeyman in Indigenous Lives

Manitoba Assembly of First Nations are wanting to get rid of the Indian Act.  Many agree with him, like Niigaan Sinclair, Professor at University of Manitoba. Who can disagree?  For me its interesting. I have some reservations but on a whole I think we need to change the relationship with the Federal government for sure. If getting rid of the Indian Act is one way to do it, well that's great.

I think we should be doing things that benefit our community. Question is what are those things. I used to say the first question to ask ourselves when in Leadership is: how will this benefit the community?

I think that is it. We are not really sure what in fact will benefit the community?  We are always chasing the Boogeyman. Phil Fontaine did it with the Residential School claims ( or at least he picked up the battle cry). Harold Cardinal fought the 1969 White Paper Boogeyman.  Elijah did it with Meech Lake.  The Mohawks fought the Quebec Boogeyman (SQ) and the Canadian Forces and many other events of Boogeyman battles.  Our people fought the 1985 Constitution repatriation.  No doubt there are going to be more fights and battles to come. There are many individuals looking for battles with boogeyman. We see it in the local communities when people are attacking one another or the local leadership. We see it when "Traditional" people attack other Traditional people. We see it with "Warriors" attacking anyone who doesn't see their way.

The thing I wonder, if we are searching for a silver bullet? Looking for the one thing to alleviate the woes of our people. Will it be scrapping the Indian Act?  I sincerely doubt it? Will it be ending the Fiduciary of Treaty?  I don't think so.  Will it be resource revenue sharing?  Probably not. Will it be getting rid of the Church in Indigenous communities?  Wouldn't hurt for sure.

I bet you the Canadian Security Intelligence Service (CSIS) has an idea of what can be the silver bullet for Indigenous-First Nations. They once reported they saw Aboriginal Gangs as a threat to Canada. I think it is not what they see as the real threat. As they have said it is the "lone wolf" threat they fear. At least that is what they fear from foreign threats. For Canada the threat to Canada is the Traditional Indian Nationalist.  Why would a CSIS threat be the silver bullet for Indigenous community and their woes?

It is because the Traditionalists will have the foundation of what is a Nation. They will come to know their purpose; their entitlement. Not the entitlement of the mentality we see in the Reserve now, where everyone expects to be given something and to get something. No, the entitlement of being a Child of the Creator with your own laws and life. Not what is dictated by way of government transfer payments, policies and legalities. CSIS sees the  root of what makes a Nation want to stand up. For some it is the radicalization of their society.  This is when you see the Nation become the Boogeyman against the ruling governments.

It is not happening right now. We are right now chasing the Boogeyman and wishing for someone to fix our woes. Its many things influencing our chase of Boogeyman. We shouldn't be looking for the Boogeyman.

We know the answers to our woes but we keep those answers in our closed groups. We speak openly in our friend circles. We talk about our people and the ills they face. We know the answers for our problems.  We know it is about becoming disciplined. We know it is not relying on the Band Office for our wants. We know it is not sitting in the pulpit or the pews of the Church. We know it's not electing the stupid individual who only wants a job or status. We know it is not in the Warrior who battles their own people. We know it's not in the gangs as they are the scum of our community. Gangs are the joke of the big money. We know it's not in the hands of the ruling government. We know it is not in our people elected in main stream political parties. We know it will not be in the University. We know it's not in the loud mouth schnooks yelling around. We do know it is in the words and Teachings of our Ancestors.  It is in those people willing to share the Teachings. We know it is not the attitude of me me me.  We know it is in the Lodge holders, the Road Chiefs, the Sundance Chiefs, the Youth  and  in the Women.

Right now we will continue to complain. We will stage small battles with the Boogeyman. But we are going to  become the Boogeyman for the ruling party and CSIS knows this. Don't think its true. Watch how hard they fight with Indigenous battles right now. You must remember Gustafen Lake and how much bullets the police used?

Now the sad thing is we are doing much of the boogeyman's work right now by fighting each other and crying individual entitlement. We need first to fight our individual entitlement whine and do it for ourselves. The "ourselves" will be the youth, the Women and the Traditionalist.

Frank Orvis = Folk Art Extraordinaire

Met a fine old man yesterday, Mr. Frank Orvis. (forvis@mymts.net)  Frank Orvis is a Sagkeeng First Nation citizen, his Mom was a Morrisseau from Fort Alexander, Manitoba. Frank grew up in the Grand Marais area and later moved to East Selkirk.  I believed his Dad worked as a commercial Fisherman and lived at Madison Island for a while as well. Frank joined the Army is Korean War Veteran.

Mr Frank Orvis. Artist 204-482-6084

I met Frank through my nephew Dr. Jeremy Patzer, who had met Frank a few weeks ago at a relatives funeral. Jeremy noticed Frank had a beautiful hand craved Diamond Willow cane. So Jeremy commented on his cane and they talked about Diamond Willow. Prior to meeting Frank, we had recently met a university professor who was looking for Diamond Willow. She, the professor is helping a Chief from New Found Land - Miawpukek First Nation. So it was fortuitous to meet Frank.

We went to visit him at his home in Selkirk Manitoba. It was a very nice visit. Frank is an artist. Many would label his art as Folk Art. In any case he is gifted. He makes Talking and Walking Sticks. He travels all over Manitoba looking for Diamond Willow. It was great to visit with him as he told us where he picked certain sticks.  On some trips he said he would come home with either one or none. It was quite interesting to hear his advice and experience on where he found and didn't find Diamond Willow. He has a large collection of willow in his garage. He has been collecting for over six years. Some of the willow are carved while many are peeled and drying. He also does painting and carving.

 I think Frank will be happy to find a number of his Diamond Willows have made their way to the East Coast. They are appreciated. Thanks Frank. 

raw peeled diamond willow

craved willow

Bear Cravings by Frank

almost finished

Frank painted boats he knows of and where the boats worked.

Boats of the area

His painted rocks to welcome people. 

Grief - multiply by infinity take to the depth of forever and you will still have barely a glimpse...

Joe Black: So that's what love is according to William Parrish?

William Parrish: Multiply it by infinity, and take it to the depth of forever, and you will still have barely a glimpse of what I'm talking about.

Joe Black: Those were my words.

William Parrish: They're mine now.

The movie was called Joe Black and it was a dead man-to-be speaking with Death.  A long movie. I watched it a few times. I am a fan of Brad Pitt and Sir Anthony Hopkins. It was a weird movie. Death falls in love with this Doctor. The Doctor role played by exquisite actor Claire Forlani.  Her character was a doctor but she was like a wilted flower. A doctor yet and still having the damsel in distress role. Weird.

Anyway I was thinking of the quote of William Parrish and Joe Black. That is how many of us must feel when it comes to understanding or trying to comprehend our grief.

A relative and friend recently lost their child/grandchild/niece and it is tragic. No words can  possibly capture the hurt, the anguish, the pain and the loss they are going through. That is why I think of the quote. It is infinite.

They say time heals all wounds. I know that it is not true. Sure it does mend some wounds and some grief. Still some wounds will never heal.

If it were true that wounds heal we would not have the "broken heart syndrome".

For me the loss of our Son is never going to heal. I struggle every single night with the knowledge of his death.

I know loss. Many of us do. We have lost parents grandparents siblings cousins friends and of sadly children.  When my nephew died my Mom was devastated. I remember thinking about how I was affected but not to the extent of my Mother and I had no clue. She was overwhelmed with the loss of her Grandson.  So now that I have lost a child (will be eleven years this August) I can start to comprehend her sorrow  and a little of the sorrow my friends are experiencing.

Can you imagine the sorrow in our communities? The loss of life in our community is huge. I am speaking about the Indigenous community. With all the social ills faced by Indigenous folk the world over, you have to wonder how the Creator can allow this to go on?

My faith is not all that strong anymore. It is the crippling  guilt of loss which has me wondering many times. Still I try to have faith. Have faith I will once again see the love ones I miss.

If there is no chance of that, then what is the point?

But I think also of the lives still here. They are gifts. Gifts. We should appreciate those gifts even while we are gripped by grief. Grief will always be there, sitting on our shoulders but the gifts will be there as well, the gifts are within our grasps. We must hang onto the gifts.

I miss my Son every single day. I struggle many times with thoughts of self harm but it is the grasp that I have on the gifts in front of me that keep my living.

I love my gifts. The gifts I am thankful the Creator has presented to me. 

Who's your Daddy? or Hey Little School Girl.

Just pretty and special. 

A facebook caption "pedophiles dream" beside this picture. The topic was about sexualisation of children. It seems to be true. We can look at the tragic story of Jonbenet Ramsey as an extreme example. It seems to be everywhere and it is normalized product of society.

I watched the tv show "How I met your Mother" and this one episode joked about the phrase "Who's your Daddy" and how when considered it is really creepy. (At least I think that is the tv show. These tv sitcoms are all the same with character's and humour.) It also occurred to me, we like to sexualize the child in song as well.

Not pretty and not special. 

"Hey Little School Girl" line was used in  the Stan Kubicek movie Full Metal Jacket. The image was even used by  Britney Spears in one of her first videos. Wonder what the message is here?

I do admit "Who's your Daddy" is not only used as a sexual reference but one of dominance. (Which in a way is a sexual thing as well, but anyway).  We seem to like thinking of young girls and why is that?

But see that's the thing isn't it? We use something so much it becomes normal - the everyday - the part of society.

The message used many times is subtle that is right there in the open and we just accept it.

I laughed at this one comment on Youtube video of Neil Diamond's "Girl, you'll be a woman soon."
"I know what Neil is talking about. Last week I came home from work and my girlfriend was standing at the top of the stairs with her suitcase packed. I asked her what's up she said I'm leaving you and I'm like why ? she said I have reason to believe that you're a pedophile and I said pedophile that's a rather large word for a 10 year old. I'll miss her ."



Do we sexualize just the girl image or is it normal with boys as well?

Lot of songs will play the little girl angle. I really like the song by Waylon Jennings; Only Daddy who will Walk the Line. 

Its funny eh? The way we just accept how normal things are? Like being a sinner as in original sin? Who is born with sin?  Geez that's crazy but just another normality in society, where Women are the original tempters.  Temptation line reminds me of this tv show Criminal Minds or CSI where a pedophile drugs a little child in the washroom of a kids play room and when he is caught he says "She tempted him"???  It's just a show but it sure made a statement.

There is a 1950's fun song called Little Bitty Pretty One. It is a song that makes you want to smile and dance. Thing is the song is kind of creepy. 

Tell you a story
Happened long time ago
A-little bitty pretty one
I've been watchin' you grow

Little bitty pretty one
Come on and talk-a to me
Lovey dovey lovey one
Come sit down on my knee

Oh well its just normal.