In 1981 I was hired as nightwatchman and for general duties at a Native residential treatment centre. Both men and women from all over came for addiction treatment. The Treatment centre was located on an Indian Reserve. A local priest, a relatively young White man was volunteering counseling services there. I befriended many of the men and women at the centre. This one young woman told me of her counseling session. I of course don't know the whole context of the session but what she told me was kind of weird, shocking.
The priest had asked her; "are you a garbage can for sperm?" I guess the word sperm from a priest is what I found shocking and weird. I think about it now and try to understand his motives. Maybe he was trying to build her up or get her to examine her choices? Still the woman didn't appreciate it and thought it was creepy and perhaps perverted.
Our feelings or views on a woman's life has a deep-seated negativity. We see them as the temptress in the Garden of Eden. We see them as the person who introduced AIDS in to your life. The person who took you down into the world of addictions. We blame the Women on a host of individual and social ills faced by man: the cheating wife, the home wrecker, the break up of the Beatles. The Woman is so vile to even touch; the Christian God didn't want to have sex with her so he got her pregnant without touching her. How wild is that?
Why do we continue doing that? Why do we ask them if they are a garbage can for sperm? Why do we not treat them with the respect they deserve? It is now part of the social norm where Women are seen as the garbage can for sperm. The advertising agency knows and uses this to sell their goods. Women are using the image for success in today's consumer world. Regardless of the endeavour (business) chances are a Women's image - provocative and sexual will be used.
We need to start being aware of how we view Women. Why would someone call any Woman a garbage can for sperm. Would you call a Granny a garbage can for sperm. Would you call your Mom a garbage can for sperm? Would call your sister a cock-teaser? Would you call your daughter a whore? If you would there is something deplorable about you. If you wouldn't say that to them, then why the same judgement of other Women? And why is the most vile thing you can think of calling someone is the "C" word?
So how can men join the move to change our thinking?
The first thing for us men, is to just shut up.
We need to listen.
We need to be quiet.
We need to shut up and listen to Women.