Let's face it, everyone loves a good story, even more so a good juicy rumour. I like to listen to such gossip and even spread it around a bit. Some stories are very good and some are just plain bad. But what the heck.
Speaking of stories, today I found a wallet. I was taking Bruce Willis, our dog, out for a walk. By the tree on our front yard, there were scraps of paper all over the ground. I noticed a wallet. It was one of those fat wallets, the kind a woman would carry. The pieces of paper were bank statements from an ATM. I picked up the wallet and I saw it had ID in it. So I went over and put it by the door of our house. I kept on going for the walk with Bruce Willis. I phoned my wife to tell to get the wallet and check the ID, maybe we would try return it later. She phoned my back and told me that the address was close by and for me to walk it over. I went back to the house and took the wallet over the block of the address. On the way there, I found more ATM papers, some credit cards, ATM card and a sliver box. When I got to the house, there was no answer at the door. That damn Bruce Willis took a big crap right in front of the house. It was raining out and I was kind of peeved that the guy was not home. So I didn't pick up after Bruce Willis, I left his calling card right there, and it was a huge calling card, and smelly.
I told my wife what happened, the no answer and Bruce Willis leaving his stuff there. She asked me if I picked it up. I hesitated, but did tell her I left it there. She gave me heck and asked why would you do that? I guess I was kind of upset that I wouldn't get to see the guys face and see that I was a hero. So I retaliated with an arsenal and left my wrath at this door. Poor guy victimized twice.
Or was he a victim? I told my wife that the guy probably got all juiced up drunk last night and kicked his wife out. So she just walked down the street flinging his cards and shit all over the place. And the reason he is not answering the door is that he is still hanging over and sleeping off the night of partying. My wife said, no he is probably at the Church as he had to take his Grandmother to the service. But that can't be as today is Monday. I still maintain it was a night of debauchery, drinks and mayhem.
I went back to the house later on and still no answer. So I figured I would give up on my being noisy to meet the guy and just went to the house next to his. I ran the door bell, and this middle age East Indian gentleman came to the door. He saw Bruce Willis and closed the door quickly. So I talked to him through the door. He agreed to take the wallet and said he would check the address. That is where I left it. I guess I would not get to hear what happened.
But Bruce Willis made me stop at house down the way from our home. It is the house where Winston lives. Winston is a 130 pound Olde English Bulldog and Mastiff mix. Winston is Bruce Willis' good buddy. They like to tussle. Anyway the owner, was telling me that someone rifled through her car last night. Didn't take anything as there was nothing to take. My daughter tells me that lot of kids like to go "car hopping". They check car doors to be open and just go through stuff. So maybe it wasn't a drunken rampage going on at the house down the block, but a case of car hopping. So from the business card of the lost wallet said the guy was an employee of an Alcoholism agency in the city. I guess he didn't slip of the old wagon and go nuts. Oh well, there goes my theory (story).
I understand that making up stories is a big business and is part of being who we are. Me, I am a big fan of fiction, stories, and not so much gossip. If it is natural to tell stories, why is gossip a different animal. It is frowned upon. You are not seen as good if you tell gossip and what the hell is the difference between stories and gossip anyway?
I hear gossip about our Reserve all the time and many of the stories are negative. Some are just wrong and some are juicy. Like it is said our Chief is going around telling people he is "a self made millionaire" and he has two mortgages in Winnipeg and one in Hollow Water. If that is true than good for him. Working and success is something we need more of. On the other hand people will jump up and down condemning him for his good fortune. The nature of gossip. Why can't gossip be good? I guess it is not gossip if its not positive. Maybe that is the difference between stories and gossip. Gossip is inherently bad while stories are fun and can be positive?
Speaking of gossip in Indian country...
oh, by the way, on my second trip to the house, I did scoop up the Bruce Willis calling card.
Ojibway Revelations: Indian Stuff. Not for phoney Indians with zero funny. Important, this could very well be the greatest blog on Indian stuff. Note may not please anal bleached perspectives. So read on Neechies, Blacks, P0C and White folk. Comments appreciated.
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Great writing, and I love that you named your dog Bruce Willis, that is classic! And my moms favorite actor.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work, your are doing your family proud with this blog.
Great-as usual .You can be so predictable! As for Bruce Willis: outstanding communication skills, very noticeable…However, Mr.Bruce should choose drop spots for his scented business cards more carefully. If he left one under the door of a dude called Steven he could be accused of po-poo-lism,and if it was in front of a white house it might be seen as conspiracy and Bruce could pass to history as a notorious indigenous dog!
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